Do you want us to lose the war

AKA
First Published1917

Writer/composerWeston / LeeRoudRN16707

Music Hall PerformersSam Mayo
Folk performancesSource Singers
Unklnown, 1960 England : Sheffield
Porter, Bill 1961 England : Sussex
Modern performances
Coope, Boyes and Simpson
From 1917 sheet music 

A lady went to the butcher’s shop for half a pound of meat.
The butcher carved her off a slice that wasn’t very sweet. 
She sniffed at it and said, “Oh dear, is that the best you’ve got?
It smells too high for me to buy”, the butcher shouted, “What?

Do you want us to lose the war? Do you want us to lose the war? 
It’s not very tasty I’ll freely admit, 
But you’ve got to ’ave it and put up with it. 
You can’t stop that old cow from doing its bit. 
Do you want us to lose the war?” 

A soldier sat with a lady fair inside the park one night
He squeezed and squeezed and squeezed and squeezed and then he squeezed her tight
She said "I'm married, you must know, and so I can't kiss you"
The soldiers said "I shan't go back to camp until you do.

Do you want us to lose the war? Do you want us to lose the war?
And when she got back to her husband, what sauce!
He had her brought up to the court for divorce.
Said the judge: "Is it true?" And she answered "Of course -.
Do you want us to lose the war?”

Oh, Brown sat in the Rose and Crown and talked about the war. 
He dipped his finger in ’is beer and then began to draw. 
Said he, “Now here’s the British lines and here’s the German foe.” 
Then the potman shouted “Time!”, and Brown said, “’Alf a mo’! 

Do you want us to lose the war? Do you want us to lose the war?
I’d mapped it all out we were certain to win, 
Then you shouted out “Time!” and I think it’s a sin. 
With another ’alf pint we’d ’ave been in Berlin. 
Do you want us to lose the war?” 

A youth and maid went for a walk one night not far from here.
The girl said to her boy: "I wish you'd buy some chocolate's dear!" 
He went into a shop for some, with cunning in his eyes, 
The shopman nearly had a fit, and answered with surprise:

Do you want us to lose the war? Do you want us to lose the war?
Then said as he picked up the seven-pound weight, 
"Get out of it quick or I'll murder you straight!
Fancy asking for chocolates at twenty past eight!
Do you want us to lose the war?

An early 20th century Music Hall song remembered by traditional singers in the 1960s, though various new verses seem to have been added over time. It was popularised in the halls by  Sam Mayo, and written by the prolific Weston and Lee.

You can hear Bill Porter sing it on the Sussex Traditions website

Coope, Boyes and Simpson sing it at the Holmfirth Folk Festival in 2004:

Sources:

image_print