Two Obadiahs, The

THE TWO OBADIAHS
Words and Music by H. P. Lyste.

Said the young Obadiah to the old Obadiah,
I am dry, Obadiah, I am dry.
Said the old Obadiah to the young Obadiah,
That's queer, Obadiah, so am I.
But the two Obadiahs had between them not a sou,
Every Publican smiled, and said, Oh ho ! my friend, it's you 
May I ask, Obadiah, if you'll pay what is due ?
Said the two Obadiahs, Oh be damned, Oh be damned!

Said the young Obadiah to the old Obadiah, 
I've a plan, Obadiah, I've a plan.
Said the old Obadiah to the young Obadiah,
If that's so, Obadiah, I'm your man.
Said the young Obadiah, for weak liquor don't repine, 
For my landlady's uncle sells a proper sort of wine, 
It's in quarts, Obadiah, and it's called paraffine.
Said the old Obadiah, that'll do, that'll do.

Said the young Obadiah to the old Obadiah,
What a joke, Obadiah, what a joke ! 
Said the old Obadiah to the young Obadiah,
Let us smoke, Obadiah, let us smoke.
For I wouldn't hint for world's that the liquor isn't right
But it's potent, Obadiah, and I feel I'm getting tight,
So just hand me the 'baccabox and serve out a light,
Obadiah, Obadiah, Obaday.

Said the young Obadiah to the old Obadiah, 
I am drier, Obadiah, I am drier.
Said the old Obadiah to the young Obadiah, 
I'm on fire, Obadiah, I'm on fire !
As the two Obadiahs were consumed by their thirst, 
The neighbours hurried in and prevented the worst, 
By pumping so hard that the engines all burst.
Obadiah, Obadiah didn't die!

Moral :
Said the old Obadiah to the young Obadiah, 
A lesson, Obadiah, I have learnt.
Said the young Obadiah to the old Obadiah, 
I am burnt, Obadiah, I am burnt !
And because, Obadiah, we did all but cremate, 
In future we will try to avoid such a fate.
Oh! smoking and drinking are sins very great 
Said the old Obadiah, stick to tea, stick to tea!


THE TWO OBADIAHS.
H.P.LYSTE'S NEW VERSION. 
Written expressly for and Sung with immense success by G. H. MACDERMOTT.

Said the young Obadiah the old Obadiah,
"I am dry, Obadiah, I am dry,"
Said the old Obadiah, to the young Obadiah, 
"Well that's queer, Obadiah, so am I,"
But the two Obadiahs had between them not a brown, 
And all they sought to borrow from responded with a frown 
You must pay us what you owe before we lend you what you need,
Said the old Obadiah"Oh be d—d." 

Said the young Obadiah, to the old Obadiah,
"I've a plan, Obadiah, I've a plan,"
Said the old Obadiah,to the young Obadiah, 
"If that's so, Obadiah,I'm your man:"
Then the young Obadiah took the watch from out his fob, 
Upon which a sympathising Uncle lent him thirty bob, 
Said the young Obadiah "Now I think that we are right"
Said the old Obadiah "For the night"

Said the young Obadiah, to the old Obadiah, 
"And now Obadiah what d'ye think? "
Said the old Obadiah, to the young Obadiah,
"Let us Rink, Obadiah, let us Rink;"	
Then they strolled into a Rink when two ladies fair they met,
On the Asphalte by their charmers both the heroes were upset
"How much Obadiah shall we spend of what we've got,"
Said the old Obadiah "Blue the lot"


Said the young Obadiah,to the old Obadiah, 
"With the ladies, Obadiah we are right," 
Said the old Obadiah,to the young Obadiah, 
"I'm getting,Obadiah,rather tight	.
Our money is all gone and these ladies want to go, 
And have a leetle supper at a leetle place they know, 
Said the young Obadiah "I'm getting in a funk,"
Said the old Obadiah "Let us bunk."

Said the girl behind the bar to.the young Obadiah, 
"You owe me,Sir, for that last claret cup,"
Said the old Obadiah to the girl behind the bar, 
"Stick it up, my pretty darling, stick it up,"
But the barmaid said "There's nothing Sir that's stuck up about me
And she called in the Police to arbitrate between the three, 
Said the young Obadiah What on earth is to be done;'
Said the old Obadiah "Cut and run?'

Said the girl behind the bar to the old Obadiah, 
"Woman's rights,Obadiah, I require,"
Said the old Obadiah to the girl behind the bar,
"Don't aspire,gentle creature,don't aspire,"
For Englishmen all know what are really woman's rights, 
And aint gulled by Lydia Beckers nor by Mrs Jacob Brights'. 
Oh! most Englishwomen aint like them you take my word,
Said the old Obadiah "Thank the Lord:'

Said the young Obadiah, to the old Obadiah,
"There'll be war,-Obadiah, there'll be war," 
Said the old Obadiah,to the young Obadiah,
"If we're wanted Obadiah Here we are."
"For we've done with sneaking policies like that of yesterday,
"And we speak out our mind in a Dizzygreeable way,"
Said the young Obadiah".Arbitration was our shame, 
Derbytration is a better sort of game."

“Rinking” refers to roller skating a new craze in the 1870s, Lydia Baker and Jacob Bright were campaigners for women’s suffrage, Dizzy and Derbytration refer to Conservative prime ministers Disraeli and Lord Derby