I got married this morning

First Published 1896
Writer/composer AJ Mills and Bennett Scott Roud RN31751

Music Hall Performers Charles Bignell
Folk performances Collected from the singing of:
unknown Irish singer; Co. Monaghan : Ireland, c1937		 

Personal transcription from 1907 recording:

For twenty years and twenty days I courted Martha Birch
This morn I bought a wedding ring and escorted her to church
The parson quickly tied the knot, and I was very glad
To get outside, for the dollar bill I'd given him was bad
Amidst a shower of rice and mud we 'round the corner flew
The wedding breakfast over, we'd a pint of beer or two
Found myself inside a train, got here in a whizz
But I forgot my new-made wife and I don't know where she is

I got married this morning at half past ten. 
Off I started as happy as nineteen men.
But I forgot my bride, all through my absent mind.
What's the good of a honeymoon if you leave the wife behind.

I pulled a cord and stopped the train, the conductor's temper rose
He jumped into the luggage car and punched me on the nose
And when we reached the station, all the brakeman in a batch
Tossed me in a blanket in a wicked game of catch
She's trying to sue me for divorce, this wire tells me so
Am I a married man or not? Well  I'm blowed if I know
When I think of the home I bought, I feel inclined to weep
There's a double bed and a kitchen stove, I'd like to sell them cheap

A comic song made famous by Charles Bignell in 1896, with words by AJ Mills and music by Bennett Scott. It was recorded in the early 20th century by Edward Favor for Edison Records:

1901 recording by Edward M Favor, Edison Records

It was remembered 40 years later by an Irish singer and collected by May Fitzpatrick (aged 12) as part of a huge project in which folklore and local tradition were compiled by pupils from 5,000 primary schools in the Irish Free State between 1937 and 1939 (Irish National Folklore Collection). 

As collected by May Fitzpatrick:

I got married this morning at half past ten. 
I am as happy as nineteen men.
The parson quickly tied the knot and I was offaly glad.
For the two bob piece I had given him it was so terribly bad.
But I forgot my bride all through my absent mind.
So where's the good of a honeymoon when you leave your wife behind.

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