Down in a diving bell

Once I was a sailor bold. Some tales to you I'll tell
Of all the wonders I have seen when in a diving bell.
While on the ocean, messmates for money challeng'd me
I'd not the pluck to go and see the mermaids in the sea.

Down in a diving bell at the bottom of the sea,
That's a pretty place the fishy sights to see.
Down in a diving bell at the bottom of the sea,
Nice little mermaids, pretty little mermaids, all come courting me.

When I was only halfway down, mermaids came to me.
They sang and danc'd to welcome me, far down in the sea.
They came in hundreds to shake hands. So many turn'd me pale,
For a very funny thing that all mermaids should shake hands with their tail.

When I reach'd the bottom, there I saw a thing to make me laugh.
They'd made a clothesline out of the Atlantic Telegraph.
And old mermaids disclos'd to me with salt tears in their eyes,
Although 'twas under water, 'twas very bad weather to dry. 

I caught a pretty mermaid. To kiss her was my wish,
But like an eel she slipp'd away, for you can't hold onto fish.
Her mother brought her back again and whisper'd unto me
That if I like down there I might get married in the sea.

We married were at a funny church that was built of oyster shells.
The parson wore a bathing gown. A codfish rang the bells.
I'm married now and happy. You girls are in the shade.
You can't compare to mine so fair altho' she's a mermaid.