Jock M’Graw, The Fattest Man in the Forty Twa

John Macraw  (The fattest man in the Forty-Twa)
Written and Composed by HARRY LINN, Arranged by CHARLES W CURTISS.

Noo I'm a noble soldier bold
And only twenty five years old,
A braver warrior ne'er was seen,
Frae Inverness tae Gretna Green,
When I was young my faither said,
He'd put me tae a decent trade,
I didna like hard work at a'
So left and join'd the Forty-Twa.
 
The wind may blaw and the cock may craw,
The rain may rain and the snaw may snaw,
Ye couldna frichten John Macraw,
The fattest man in the Forty-Twa.

The sergeant when he 'listed me,
He winked his e'e and then says he,
"A man like you sae stoot and tall,
Could n'er be killed by cannon-ball."
The Captain then tae me came roun'
He looked me up and looked me doon,
And shouts "Here sergeant, why, you scamp,
You've found a lamp-post out on tramp."
                
In oor last fecht across the sea,
The Gen'ral he sent hame for me,
When I went there wi' my big gun
Of course the battle it was won.
The enemy a' ran awa'
When they saw the legs o' John Macraw,
A man like me sae smart and neat
Ye ken yersel could n'er be beat.
 
The King then held a Grand Review,
We mustered sixty thoosand too,
The Kilty Lads went trotting past
And John Macraw, he marched the last,
The Royal Party grabb'd their spec's
And they began to stretch their necks,
The King cries "Col'nel!'pon my soul!
I took that man for a telegraph pole. 

Jock McGraw, spelled in various ways, is a name that comes up regularly in Scottish Music Hall: he features in several songs and was a comic character played by Arthur Lloyd in the halls of the 1860s.

The “Gallant Forty Twa”, the 42nd Royal Highland Regiment of Foot, aka The Black Watch was a Highland regiment which originated in the 18th century. They and their successors fought in the Napoleonic and Crimean Wars, and also were involved in the brutal suppression of the Indian Rebellion of 1857. They were celebrated in a number of popular songs, including this one and at least two other songs/variants of songs which turn up regularly in traditional music, both called The Gallant Forty Twa. One song usually had the first line For it’s noo I am a weaver and the other had first-line You may talk about your lancers, or your Irish Fusiliers.

Jock Macraw, as written by Harry Linn, is a different song again. It began life as a broadly comic song, though it obviously celebrated the tough reputation of the regiment too. Its interesting that later renditions, after passing through the oral tradition, changed “fattest” to “stoutest” perhaps slightly changing the emphasis of the song. It seems not to have been published until several years after Linn’s death.

WF Frame, the celebrated “Scotch comic” recalled Linn’s singing:

He was a jocular genius in his line. I will never forget his rendering of “Jock M’Craw the Fattest Man in the Forty Twa.” Imagine a comedian about six feet high, and as slender as they make them, singing that song:
“Says the Queen to the Colonel, upon my soul
I took that man for a telegraph pole.”

WF Frame Tells his story

Kilgarriff lists a song: “Jock McGrau” as written and sung by Will Terry aka Alf Gordon (pub date 1906). This is almost certainly a misspelling of Jock McGraw – and a recording of the song may have been made by Alf Gordon (“The Welsh Harry Lauder“) in the early 2oth century.

Robin Hall and Jimmie MacGregor sing The Stoutest Man in the Forty Twa